I swear it's not a cult but I totally recommend it! Part 5

For 10 Days I signed up to live like a monk, dedicating my time to learning the 'Goenka' Vipassana method of meditation. 

I had gotten used to the lifestyle after just a few days. In fact I had gotten so used to the sound of the waking-up bell go off in the dark that several times I actually hallucinated/dreamt the morning wake-up bell before rising out of bed, taking a shower, getting dressed and hanging around outside before realising that it was around 01:00am in the morning.

P5 - my room

The food was 100% vegetarian and was served buffet style. I had my own room with ensuite. I had gotten somewhat used to avoiding communication with the 45 or so other people living in close proximity with me. Each day I would go for short walks around the facility and stare at things for ages like a stoner - and it was normal. (In some ways the effects of prolonged silent meditation had mimicked the effect of certain drugs although the comparison would be like as walking is to riding an aeroplane.)  I had completely let go any thoughts about my phone and communication with anyone from the outside world. I didn't even want to think about opening up Facebook or checking my emails.Although we were situated in the middle of a palm oil plantation far away from any major town, you could hear the sound of motorbikes and freight trucks passing by the motorway nearby and I would begin to think of what the 'real world' was like beyond those gates.
I had developed this perspective of the outside world as being a cruel, fast moving, immoral place, only concerned about money, with no room for a life of tranquillity. Whatever purity of mind which I had managed to scrape together during these few days was surely going to evaporate the moment I stepped foot in Kuala Lumpur. I began to think of all the people out there living in ignorance; guided by unconscious thought, constantly seeking out pleasure and self gain.

Day 11 felt like graduation day. We all felt so happy and eager to discuss our experiences of the past 10 days. It really did feel like graduation because now I had to to go out into the real world knowing that although I had learned a lot, I still didn't know shit.

When our phones and other devices were returned to us I actually felt sad. For so long this small computer had almost been like an extension of my body. I had gone so long without it and felt free from it's addictive draw.

Upon returning to Kuala Lumpur I went to Mcdonalds for lunch with a fellow meditator. I was eager to see if my taste perception of meat had changed. We both agreed the chicken had a slimy texture to it but weren't sure if that was how chicken had always been or whether it was just a Mcdonalds thing! 

One of the perhaps unintended physical changes I noticed was my appetite and what I eat. During the course you are served 2 meals (breakfast and lunch). Dinner consists of a few pieces of fruit. You might think that once I got out that my appetite would suddenly increase to make up the calorie reduction but it perhaps did the opposite.  It's only been a week since the course ended and on a number of days I have reduced my meals to 1 or 2 per day. My desire for processed foods has diminished greatly, and my consumption of meat is mostly as a nutritional requirement or due to a lack of alternative options. 

Those 10 days had obviously changed my perspective and in turn how I act. I have learned to become more mindful and observant of my thoughts and emotions. It has helped me understand the human condition and as a result allowed me to both recognise my own suffering and that of others to a certain degree. I feel more at peace during any given moment. This is not to say I am now a perfect being, and I realise I have a lot more to learn but I recognise that steps have been taken towards a particular direction. The 10 day retreat was never meant to result in enlightenment but rather give you the opportunity to stop everything and observe yourself properly for once. Whether you continue what you started is the choice that every 'graduate' must make upon re-entry into the outside world. It's a way of life...

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